Hello lovely friends and family!
I am sorry I have not written in a while, after I wrote the last one, some things had changed. My chemo treatment had gotten postponed again due to my white blood count. I had to receive a shot on that Thurs., and another on that Friday to end up going back to Houston on Monday for chemo.
So treatments were set back a week. I went back up this Tues. Aug.25th to get blood work done, and to see the Dr. . We are going to do the shot each time after now to help my white count stay up. We have also decided to do radiation after the chemo is done (3 wks after), and it will last 3 1/2 wks long ( I will be able to come home on the weekends). Honestly , that is not music to my ears( being away from my family so long and especially around the holidays), but I know this is going to bump up the % of it not coming back.
So I finished my 7th round of chemo yesterday (Wed.26th). My Dr. has told me I have antisipritory disorder, it is the naseu and angziety that comes before treatment. I thought it was a joke, but he said it's in the text books. You can't controle it, it's your brain. This time before was the worst, as I did sence each time a little bit more and more. This time a actually was getting sick. So My Dr. prescribed me some meds to take prior to, gosh did that help! THANK YOU LORD!!!!! I think one of the worst things is freaking out about something that is not even happening yet, that you know isn't that horrible, telling yourself "what in the world are you doing and why are you doing it", praying that tis would go away and speaking to your subconscience and no change. TOTALLY out of your controle.
I am just so thankful that there is something that will give me some relief! You just have no idea....
So I will be home today, I have been missing my family a bunch this time. Trying not to worry about them being that this was all of there first week of school, but feeling very thankful that I was able to be there for there first day. Thankful that people helped out with meals for them.
I am so proud to say that God has provided in such big ways lately. We are finished paying off our San Marcos hospital bills ! Thank you Lord and for all the support from people out here, some that I have never meet before. I pray that God's blessings will fall upon you in just the perfect way and just the perfect timing that you have no doubt where it is coming from "Your heavenly Father". My hope and prayer was that I wouldn't receive one of M.D.Anderson bill until l paid off the ones near my home. THAT HAS BEEN THE CASE!
I was called down to the billing office yesterday @ M.D.Anderson and asked them when should I expect one from them, and they said they don't understand why i haven't. They said you usually start getting them a month after . O.K. guys and gals, I started in May! Heeeeeeeeeeeeello! Looks like Papa has answered my prayers once again. lol
Prayer request: I am prating now that when my husband sends our tax papers to them this week that we will and would be covered for more then 50% if not 100%, That would be amazing, and I know God could do this He has already done so many huge things.
Please stand with me in prayer as we continue to walk this out, as I lay this in my Papa's hands, not piece by piece, but everything, all of it.
I thank you all for the love, prayers,and support that my family and I have been given, felt, and received. I thank God so very much for you.
TO GOD BE THE GLORY!
**Praise Report**
God has been doing great things this summer in my family.
** Bailey ( My cute, wonderful and unique Bailey Bug who is 11 now and starting Jr. High this year) Has given his life to Christ and followed through in baptism. Praise you Father, your ways, your timing, and not our own,
** Kolbi Lynn ( My beautiful, outgoing, 14yr.old Kokobean, who loves her sports!) Has went on a mission trip, has heard her Father's voice, Is on her 2nd Bible study, and wants to walk the walk she has already committed to.
** Gage (My handsome SENIOR the Gagester! Agggggggg I can't believe I'm saying that already) Who has went to serve @ a Christian camp for 3weeks this summer, who is earnestly seeking God in so many ways, including his future disitions, and who is also preparing to walk out his disition of baptism to show the commitment he has and is making
too. To walk the walk not just talk the talk!
** Sheth( Ahh little Shetharooni, who is starting kinder this year and just turned 6, the one with spunk and ditermination). We sit and wait to see what great things are ahead for him, He sits and watches his siblings oh so carefully and loves them soooo. He sits and prays for his momma every night and says he knows Jesus will heal her, and also prays that his teacher will have Jesus in her heart. I see the work already @ hand.
What satin may come to try to steal, kill, or destroy, GOD WORKS OUT FOR HIS GOOD!! FOR HIS GLORY!!!! Amen! Come on, give me a AMEN!!!!
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Today I leave to head back to Houston. ROUND 6! Half way done, and I can't believe it! Have my eyes set on October...
My mind has been very busy these days with trying to understand the things I am being taught. Patients, giving things up (not in my timing or my control), appreciating the little things (the details/thought behind things/the heart), seeing how God is showing His love to me, by getting roses delivered, bills getting paid one @ a time,kids school supplies being paid for. Realizing that this is my body, even though it may have issues, it is the one that HE has chosen for me! My journey that He has called me to walk out. Seeing Him as my PROVIDER, not just saying it or knowing it, but claiming it! He is who He says He is and walking in faith that He will do what He says He can do! I have been trying to understand and work things out with my human mind, and that is not how my Papa works at all.
I am so very blessed by the family and friends that are placed in my life. My birthday was such a special one! I had know idea that my lovely friends were going to come kidnap me, blindfold me, and take me away to a surprise party where my handsome husband and spectacular friends would be! It was such a wonderful evening, and I definitely felt the love.
Today I am rejoicing in being half way done! Part of this feels like it is going by soooo fast and the other part feels , well, not so much! ha
School starting for the kids is right around the corner on the 24th, all enrolled and getting excited. The funny reality of Sheth starting Kinder, and Gage graduating High school all in the same year is quite amusing! As well as the shock of Gage turning 17 yesterday is putting plenty of things in a new light. Where have all the years gone? The time that we have with our kiddos seem to fly by so very fast.We hope and pray that we are doing all we can do to prepare them emotionally and spiritually . I love them sooo very much! Each one so special and unique.
I am a very proud mom , and look forward to seeing what this year is gonna hold for all of them, but especially Mr. Senior, and pray it is the best year ever. Kolbi is all excited about getting into sports again, as Bailey bug is starting his 1st year of Jr.High ! And Sheth, well he told me "I am kinda nervous about starting cause there will be a bunch of people there ." I on the other hand really have no worries about Mr.Social butterfly! lol
Well, I hope everyone is having a wonderful summer and a blessed week. Much love sent.
My mind has been very busy these days with trying to understand the things I am being taught. Patients, giving things up (not in my timing or my control), appreciating the little things (the details/thought behind things/the heart), seeing how God is showing His love to me, by getting roses delivered, bills getting paid one @ a time,kids school supplies being paid for. Realizing that this is my body, even though it may have issues, it is the one that HE has chosen for me! My journey that He has called me to walk out. Seeing Him as my PROVIDER, not just saying it or knowing it, but claiming it! He is who He says He is and walking in faith that He will do what He says He can do! I have been trying to understand and work things out with my human mind, and that is not how my Papa works at all.
I am so very blessed by the family and friends that are placed in my life. My birthday was such a special one! I had know idea that my lovely friends were going to come kidnap me, blindfold me, and take me away to a surprise party where my handsome husband and spectacular friends would be! It was such a wonderful evening, and I definitely felt the love.
Today I am rejoicing in being half way done! Part of this feels like it is going by soooo fast and the other part feels , well, not so much! ha
School starting for the kids is right around the corner on the 24th, all enrolled and getting excited. The funny reality of Sheth starting Kinder, and Gage graduating High school all in the same year is quite amusing! As well as the shock of Gage turning 17 yesterday is putting plenty of things in a new light. Where have all the years gone? The time that we have with our kiddos seem to fly by so very fast.We hope and pray that we are doing all we can do to prepare them emotionally and spiritually . I love them sooo very much! Each one so special and unique.
I am a very proud mom , and look forward to seeing what this year is gonna hold for all of them, but especially Mr. Senior, and pray it is the best year ever. Kolbi is all excited about getting into sports again, as Bailey bug is starting his 1st year of Jr.High ! And Sheth, well he told me "I am kinda nervous about starting cause there will be a bunch of people there ." I on the other hand really have no worries about Mr.Social butterfly! lol
Well, I hope everyone is having a wonderful summer and a blessed week. Much love sent.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Yesterday was a long, long, veeeery long day! It was very exhausting, so at the end of the day I was zonked! I am very happy to say that the PET scan came back as clear. I have two print outs(of the PET scans) one of before(in May) and one from yesterday which is truly wowing to see side by side.
There was a spot which was around my spine that he know thinks could have been part of the cancer because it is gone. I know some people are wondering "Does this mean no more chemo"? Unfortunately not, I am sad to say! Still have to continue on !
To be honest, yesterday was like a bitter sweet to me, I know that sounds crazy. After we talked about the test results, we talked about radiation afterward. He explained that it is something he is gonna want me to see a radiologist about. He told me that he has some patients that are young that are having relapses of lymphoma, and when it comes back it comes back with a vengeance. He said what he is seeing is very sad (with those patients), but with radiation it brings your percentage of not coming back higher. He(Dr.Fowler) said that he is probl. gonna bring my case up for review @ a board meeting with lymphoma Dr.'s and radiologist.
The other side is radiation has it's own side effects such as heart attacks, breast cancer, etc. in years to come. So I wasn't running out of the building screaming unfortunately!
More on information shock or another reality of how serious this is, and again how it is totally out of our control. I am soooo very thankful that I am clear, and the Dr. is very happy with how fast this has cleared up. Just very emotional going through it, the thought of me already having the cervical cancer a few years ago, now this , and the possibilities of something in the future doesn't sound appealing. That is me being a human and my raw feelings. I know none of us know what can happen tomorrow nor 10 - 20 years from now, but when you have to hear it or think about it, it's kind of shocking.Again I have to give all of me, to my Papa! Of course I prefer side effects rather then a beast coming back, that is a no brainer, just very emotional. Ya know! I'll be 35 this month and wish for a couple of days I could make it all go away, go to "never never land" lol that would be sweeeet! If anyone has transportation there, would you please consider taking me! Haha
I thank all of yall for all the prayers and for walking with me in this, but the journey is not finished yet. So please continue to be in prayer with me, not just for me but my family as well. Love all of you bunches, and pray that all have a blessed week.
Round 5 is today!
May our Father get all the praise in this....... Our great physician and healer .
There was a spot which was around my spine that he know thinks could have been part of the cancer because it is gone. I know some people are wondering "Does this mean no more chemo"? Unfortunately not, I am sad to say! Still have to continue on !
To be honest, yesterday was like a bitter sweet to me, I know that sounds crazy. After we talked about the test results, we talked about radiation afterward. He explained that it is something he is gonna want me to see a radiologist about. He told me that he has some patients that are young that are having relapses of lymphoma, and when it comes back it comes back with a vengeance. He said what he is seeing is very sad (with those patients), but with radiation it brings your percentage of not coming back higher. He(Dr.Fowler) said that he is probl. gonna bring my case up for review @ a board meeting with lymphoma Dr.'s and radiologist.
The other side is radiation has it's own side effects such as heart attacks, breast cancer, etc. in years to come. So I wasn't running out of the building screaming unfortunately!
More on information shock or another reality of how serious this is, and again how it is totally out of our control. I am soooo very thankful that I am clear, and the Dr. is very happy with how fast this has cleared up. Just very emotional going through it, the thought of me already having the cervical cancer a few years ago, now this , and the possibilities of something in the future doesn't sound appealing. That is me being a human and my raw feelings. I know none of us know what can happen tomorrow nor 10 - 20 years from now, but when you have to hear it or think about it, it's kind of shocking.Again I have to give all of me, to my Papa! Of course I prefer side effects rather then a beast coming back, that is a no brainer, just very emotional. Ya know! I'll be 35 this month and wish for a couple of days I could make it all go away, go to "never never land" lol that would be sweeeet! If anyone has transportation there, would you please consider taking me! Haha
I thank all of yall for all the prayers and for walking with me in this, but the journey is not finished yet. So please continue to be in prayer with me, not just for me but my family as well. Love all of you bunches, and pray that all have a blessed week.
Round 5 is today!
May our Father get all the praise in this....... Our great physician and healer .
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Catching everyone up to speed. Today is Monday the 21st, and Saturday made a week of the shaved head! Yes, I am sporting the bald look! To hot for a wig or a hat for that matter, and praise God that he has given my a decent one! (head that is :O) )
Today was suppose to be the PET scan, but got there and they forgot to remind me not to eat for 6 hrs before. So It is rescheduled for tomorrow @ 8:00am and results should also be tomorrow.
It has been a good two weeks, just a bit tired. Still trying to hand over the money situation to God and leave it there. To be honest it is my biggest struggle seeing how it just increases each time by the thousands. It's hard to grasp or swallow when you can predict the ballpark figure that this will end up in. I drive down the road in thought, and my mom asks "what are you thinking about". I respond "thinking about not thinking about the bills", and continued saying "If they cross your mind, they stay there for a minute and then worry sets in again, which then makes you frustrated cause your not suppose to be worrying @ all since you placed @ the foot of the cross". I am trying to leave them there, I am trying to leave a bunch of things there and not worry about them. I know it does no good, I know my life is way more valuable and doesn't have a price value on it. More precious then silver, more costly then Gold. I know it's just money, just didn't plan "I didn't plan" for us to be in debt! Did not want that to happen! Just goes to show you how things aren't really in our control @ all. That is my prayer request, that I can totally be free of the worry. That it would not have any hold on me. It is my reality, but I do not need to be imprisoned by it.
I look @ my lovely kiddos, and see how they are growing from this. I see how blessed I am to have such a bunch of beautiful, helpful, and loving kids along with an amazing husband.
No none of us perfect, but all hand chosen and placed together by God and His great hand. Which is far more important to me then any bill of any amount.
My youngest just turned 6 last Friday, which made Chris and I feel wowed! Which then lead to the thought of :Our oldest is graduating this year and our youngest is starting school ! That is a crazy thought... Can't imagine all that this year is going to hold/bring.
I am resting in the comfort of my Papa's arms. I find myself wandering some times, look back and see Him still standing there waiting for me . I am thankful to have such a loving Father that is always there. Sometimes walking besides us, sometimes running to catch us, and other times carrying us! I love how He loves me.....
Thank you for the prayers and ask for them to continue.
Today was suppose to be the PET scan, but got there and they forgot to remind me not to eat for 6 hrs before. So It is rescheduled for tomorrow @ 8:00am and results should also be tomorrow.
It has been a good two weeks, just a bit tired. Still trying to hand over the money situation to God and leave it there. To be honest it is my biggest struggle seeing how it just increases each time by the thousands. It's hard to grasp or swallow when you can predict the ballpark figure that this will end up in. I drive down the road in thought, and my mom asks "what are you thinking about". I respond "thinking about not thinking about the bills", and continued saying "If they cross your mind, they stay there for a minute and then worry sets in again, which then makes you frustrated cause your not suppose to be worrying @ all since you placed @ the foot of the cross". I am trying to leave them there, I am trying to leave a bunch of things there and not worry about them. I know it does no good, I know my life is way more valuable and doesn't have a price value on it. More precious then silver, more costly then Gold. I know it's just money, just didn't plan "I didn't plan" for us to be in debt! Did not want that to happen! Just goes to show you how things aren't really in our control @ all. That is my prayer request, that I can totally be free of the worry. That it would not have any hold on me. It is my reality, but I do not need to be imprisoned by it.
I look @ my lovely kiddos, and see how they are growing from this. I see how blessed I am to have such a bunch of beautiful, helpful, and loving kids along with an amazing husband.
No none of us perfect, but all hand chosen and placed together by God and His great hand. Which is far more important to me then any bill of any amount.
My youngest just turned 6 last Friday, which made Chris and I feel wowed! Which then lead to the thought of :Our oldest is graduating this year and our youngest is starting school ! That is a crazy thought... Can't imagine all that this year is going to hold/bring.
I am resting in the comfort of my Papa's arms. I find myself wandering some times, look back and see Him still standing there waiting for me . I am thankful to have such a loving Father that is always there. Sometimes walking besides us, sometimes running to catch us, and other times carrying us! I love how He loves me.....
Thank you for the prayers and ask for them to continue.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
7/10 Update from Kristi
Good morning everyone.
I will start with Wed. when Steph & I left. On our way we stopped off for some Taco Bell!!! I was really wanting a bean burrito ! yuuuuuuuum and cringing about Steph's pictures that she was taking of our trip! So then off to the Dr.'s appointment.
Dr. said that he thought I am looking really well, and he is feeling really good about this. My blood counts were low so I will be needing to do another Lunasta shot. It was good to hear that he feels good about all of this. Music to my ears.... I had to talk to someone about the money situation and to give them a dollar ammount, so if yall can be in prayer about that/this it would be greatly appreciated.I know my God is a big one, and He can move mountains that's for sure. He can do the impossible .. Prayers are greatly appreciated. Next time I go, I will be having a PET scan again to see if the cancer is gone, which I am believing in. Yesterday I did not get sick, praise God, just slept through the night. Maybe driving had to do with me getting sick on the way home. We will see!
We are leaving and going back home today, I thank you all for your loving thoughts and prayers. Truly thanking God for taking care of my babies while I am away. Thank you Koko, and Wyana, I love the pictures of them and there adventures. Hope all have a very blessed day!
I will start with Wed. when Steph & I left. On our way we stopped off for some Taco Bell!!! I was really wanting a bean burrito ! yuuuuuuuum and cringing about Steph's pictures that she was taking of our trip! So then off to the Dr.'s appointment.
Dr. said that he thought I am looking really well, and he is feeling really good about this. My blood counts were low so I will be needing to do another Lunasta shot. It was good to hear that he feels good about all of this. Music to my ears.... I had to talk to someone about the money situation and to give them a dollar ammount, so if yall can be in prayer about that/this it would be greatly appreciated.I know my God is a big one, and He can move mountains that's for sure. He can do the impossible .. Prayers are greatly appreciated. Next time I go, I will be having a PET scan again to see if the cancer is gone, which I am believing in. Yesterday I did not get sick, praise God, just slept through the night. Maybe driving had to do with me getting sick on the way home. We will see!
We are leaving and going back home today, I thank you all for your loving thoughts and prayers. Truly thanking God for taking care of my babies while I am away. Thank you Koko, and Wyana, I love the pictures of them and there adventures. Hope all have a very blessed day!
Monday, July 6, 2009
A Day at the Beach
Thank you Michelle for this lovely personalized "Berry Beach", letting me be able to dream... Dream a little dreeeam with me! It is the next best thing to actually going there, along with smores! No complaining over here....
It's moments like this that make going through this a bit more easier.
On another note, I just found out that my white blood count for this past week are dipping again! Arrrrg.... So I wont be shocked if I have to get another Lunasta shot in the tummy tum tum 24 hours after chemo... I just wish there was something I could do, something I could take to help them stay up. Another reality of how this is so out of my hands and in my Papa's. This week has been kinda emotional so far, feel so week to be almost 35. I know it's just for a season, try to keep thinking that this season is shorter then being pregnant. Not sure if that thought is helping or not...
Well I will be Houston bound with Steph - for round 4! And I am so grateful to and for her. Wednesday is Dr. visit/ blood, and Thurs. morning is chemo !
Sending much love out to all...
Kristi
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
June 30th Update from Kristi
Hello all, these past few days haven't been the best. Very tired, and drained, along with some nausea. As some of you know I had to go to the E.R. on Friday. My arm ( not the same arm, this time the right with my PIC line in it) was swelling and we still are not sure why. They did check to see if there were any blood clots, which there weere not. Thank God! Just a wait and see kinda thing,waiting to see if I run fever of 101 or my arm gets red, or swells more! All lovely things.... So far , so good Praise God.
More hair is falling out each day, just waiting on when the day will be here to say "good bye" to the rest of it. Wishing I could sit at the beach listen to the waves, and sink my feet into the sand as I close me eyes and relax. Sounds nice huh! I know there is always next year, but today and this week is "this year", and what I am feeling in "the now".So to anyone that is going, take a deep breath in for me and revile in the moment please... Can't last outside for very long at all these days, it's just to darn HOT! I melt just opening the door. Honestly I'm just trying to get to day 7(after chemo), and trying to keep up with the 2 bible studies I am doing. Both important to me, one being with my small group, the other with my daughter and some other lovely ladies and their daughters as well.
I will say that through this season of life that we are in, I am seeing a side of my hubby that I haven't seen before, our relationship transforming into something that I didn't know it could be. Something even more beautiful! Me peeling away a outer coating of myself that has been hanging on for a while now even years, A part that needed to go . A part that felt like it had to protect ones self,that couldn't be needy, a part that could do for herself, a part called self sufficiency. Just like a scab on a wound that is healing as it is coming off is just like what this feels.You know that afterward there will be a healthy layer under it, one that is restored. Yeah, my Daddy is sure doing some good stuff !
Sorry to any that have called and I haven't responded back. I am just sooo tired and just don't have a bunch in me. I send so many thanks out again for all the loving hands that have been touching my family with love. My kids are greatly appreciating each and every thing. For the loving and inspiring cards that are received that truly put a smile on my face. Thank you... Also to those that I do not know, aww how it touches me! I thank you for your tender and caring hearts. May God continue to pour out His blessings......
More hair is falling out each day, just waiting on when the day will be here to say "good bye" to the rest of it. Wishing I could sit at the beach listen to the waves, and sink my feet into the sand as I close me eyes and relax. Sounds nice huh! I know there is always next year, but today and this week is "this year", and what I am feeling in "the now".So to anyone that is going, take a deep breath in for me and revile in the moment please... Can't last outside for very long at all these days, it's just to darn HOT! I melt just opening the door. Honestly I'm just trying to get to day 7(after chemo), and trying to keep up with the 2 bible studies I am doing. Both important to me, one being with my small group, the other with my daughter and some other lovely ladies and their daughters as well.
I will say that through this season of life that we are in, I am seeing a side of my hubby that I haven't seen before, our relationship transforming into something that I didn't know it could be. Something even more beautiful! Me peeling away a outer coating of myself that has been hanging on for a while now even years, A part that needed to go . A part that felt like it had to protect ones self,that couldn't be needy, a part that could do for herself, a part called self sufficiency. Just like a scab on a wound that is healing as it is coming off is just like what this feels.You know that afterward there will be a healthy layer under it, one that is restored. Yeah, my Daddy is sure doing some good stuff !
Sorry to any that have called and I haven't responded back. I am just sooo tired and just don't have a bunch in me. I send so many thanks out again for all the loving hands that have been touching my family with love. My kids are greatly appreciating each and every thing. For the loving and inspiring cards that are received that truly put a smile on my face. Thank you... Also to those that I do not know, aww how it touches me! I thank you for your tender and caring hearts. May God continue to pour out His blessings......
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